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Emerging into a dating relationship

The vast majority of these guys are not the self-centered, testosterone-led, immature boys you met (and maybe married) in your 20s or 30s. )If you’ve read my e Book, 7 Secrets to Finally Finding Love after 40, you know that I believe that empathizing with men is essential to your dating and relationship success.

Like you, the men you’re dating have lived and learned. The only way you can empathize is to know their side of the story.

They were the originators of a higher divorce rate, and while that divorce rate has slowed, we may be seeing a spike as people ponder whether or not they will stay with their spouses into extreme old age.

So, yes, there are plenty of reasons why a couple who have been married for 30, 40, even 50 years might break up.

David and Holly Petraeus don't fit the mold, say, of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver, since Holly Petraeus has not been nearly as prominent as her military-hero-turned-CIA-chief husband of 38 years.

And we don't know, yet, whether their marriage will survive.

They're different from the 50-year-olds who lived before them.

And although we don't celebrate divorce in this country, we are not afraid of it, either. Did you or someone you know divorce after a long-term marriage?

What were the contributing factors and what advice would you give other couples struggling to hold it together?

In previous eras, couples soldiered on even if they were very unhappy.

But boomers gave up on the concept of the dutiful-but-unhappy spouse a long time ago.

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